Aoschay ofway ethay Ychicpsay
by U-Kii-San
Summary: Arthur Kirkland needs a job. Badly. Fresh out of university, he lacks the experience for work in many places. When he sees an advertisement in the paper offering a job with good pay that didn't seem shady he goes to check it out. After, all, a workplace with Aoschay ofway ethay Ysicphay Agency as the name can't possibly very shady, can it?
1. Let's Get A Job!

**This is my second story, I really hope I can actually finish this one T_T. I got the idea a long time ago, never wrote it down, and it hit me last night so I wrote this all day w~. It's kind of a stupid idea, so just go along with it~! Please?** **Oh, the Title is in Pig Latin~ (It means Chaos of the Physic)**

**Here's the basic story: Arthur needs a job, but in the fast paced society of ours, he has been turned down due to no experience. He stumbles upon a ad in the paper, and goes to check out the curious place known as Aoschay ofway ethay Ysicphay Detective Agency. **

**Disclaimer: Hetalia is too awesome to be owned by me~ *sighs***

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Standing outside the looming building, Arthur sighed. To be honest, the only reason he applied at this place was because it was the only place willing to hire, as they put it nicely, 'Someone with absolutely no experience in the work field'. How nice. Apparently even a degree majoring in Science wasn't going to get him a well paying job until he worked in a few places to show his worth to the shitty society we have.

Gathering up his courage, he rang the bell. A few moments later, a cheery voice answered.

"Hi! I'm Im Yong Soo! I'm from Korea, and welcome to Aoschay ofway ethay Ychicpsay Agency!"

Arthur stared at the intercom. Umm... That translated to… Chaos of…

"Chaos of the Psychic?"

"Correct, da ze!"

"Okay, may I come in?"

"Oh sure~ Hang on!"

Yong Soo opened the door. "Welcome, da ze!"

He led Arthur into the building, which was surprisingly homely and bright inside. "Listen, I'm gonna be your guide today, until…" He checked his watch, "Your interview at eleven, da ze!"

Arthur nodded, trying to catch up with the Korean's fast talking.

"That's the canteen!" Yong Soo said, pointing to a set of double doors on his left. When opened, a slightly prison-like room was exposed, with a cheery atmosphere that seemed too unfitting. A silver haired man was snoring at the counter in the back.

"Hey! Gil!"

"Wha- Oh, hey Im," The albino rubbed and opened his startling red eyes. He gave a nod to acknowledge Yong Soo, and then noticed Arthur.

"Well, what do we have here?" He said, smirking at the Brit.

"Gil, Arthur. Arthur, Gil!" Yong Soo took the kind gesture to introduce them. "Hi," Arthur said, a bit uncomfortable under the albino's stare.

"Yo, new guy. Im showing ya around?"

Arthur bristled at the horrible english. "Yes, he is."

"Hm. Good luck then. Im, don't kill him, or at least let him live through the tour and for lunch."

"Okay~!" Said Yong Soo, unaware of the slightly more scared Brit behind him moving slowly away. "C'mon Arth- Can I call you Art? Arthur's kinda long…"

Arthur growled at the nickname, "Whatever…"

"Great!"

The next stop was the elevator. Yong Soo dragged him in once the metallic doors opened.

"There are a total of ten floors in this building, da ze. This floor is G, and there are nine other floors above~ Our office is on the 9th floor, da ze~" He explained, pressing the button with a 9 carved in it neatly.

Awkward silences that lifts somehow bring would have been a great break from the Koreans mindless chatter, thought Arthur, but the God of Awkward Silences could not be summoned when one is in the presence on Im Yong Soo.

"So, there's Lukas, he's probably the one to run your interview, da ze. Try and say something about faeries, you might have a better chance then! Oh, and there's Ma- Matt or something like that, and he's practically invisible, da ze! It's very hard to play hide and seek with him, though… He's also epic in battle, I swear he has two personalities, da ze! Miss Elizabeth is also-" He was cut off from his rambling as the doors slid open on the 3rd floor. A man with a thin pipe in his mouth stood there with some papers in his hand. He looked up to the occupants of the lift.

"Oh, hi Lars!" The Korean said brightly. The man nodded, and walked into the lift, pressing the 6th floor button. As the doors closed, he turned and looked at Arthur.

"Hello…" Arthur said. The man was slightly intimidating, but he seemed like a okay person. Aside from the fact he was smoking what smelled suspiciously like Marijuana.

"Arthur…." Lars frowned, seeming to look at nothing in the air. Yong Soo smiled. "Lars! Hey buddy, tell Arthur what color his name is!"

"What color is my name?" Arthur said, a bit surprised. "But names don't have colors!"

"For me they do," Lars said, "Every sound, letter, and number has a color associated with it. For sound, there normally is a shape too. Your name is dark blue with a mix of red and gold. Your voice, however, is a light orange." Arthur stared at him. Lars sighed.

"Before you ask, I don't know whether I'm crazy or not, or if I have a disease, or if its hereditary. I've had this all my life, so don't call me a freak." It was worded like a plea, but the tone made it sound like an order. Arthur nodded, newfound respect for this man. The doors of the elevator opened to show the sixth floor. The Brit caught a glimpse of a man with slicked back blonde hair and another man (brunette) hanging off his arm before the doors closed. He turned to Yong Soo as Lars exited and the doors closed.

"Yong Soo, how do you know Lars?"

"Huh? Oh, he tells us useful information on some of our… Interesting cases, da ze!" The Korean smiled.

Arthur nodded as the doors opened.

"We're here!" Yong Soo smiled, skipping out. Arthur followed.

To his left he saw a hallway with nine doors, four on either side and one in front. The theme seemed to be black for this floor. It was different from the sixth floor, which, if he remembered correctly, had positively fluorescent lighting. The ninth floor had dimmer, yellow lights.

On his right there was a door marked, 'Staff Room'. Or, at least, used to be marked Staff Room. There were about five different names to this room written over the red Staff Room sign. The most prominent one was the 'Meeting Room' words, so Arthur assumed that was the rooms purposes at the moment. Yong Soo, satisfied the Arthur had his share of staring, led him down the corridor and to the room at the end.

"Whoever is interviewing you is in there, so go in!" He said happily. "I hope you get the job, I like you, Art!" He disappeared into a side room, not noticing the faint blush on the Brits face.

Arthur took a deep breath, and pushed the door open.

His eyes slowly adjusted to the dim(mer) lighting of the room, and saw what seemed like a parlor. There was a fluffy block sofa facing two equally fluffy chairs. A man sat on the sofa, his silvery blonde hair swept to the side with a cross barrette. He turned his head to Arthur curiously.

"You must be the new applicant," He said, voice seemingly devoid of emotion. He had a slight accent, probably Scandinavian, Arthur thought.

"Ah, yes. My name is Arthur Kirkland, Sir." Arthur said, trying not to betray his nervousness.

"Look at him! So formal, Norge!" Laughed an obnoxious voice- Yes, this one was definitely Scandinavian. Arthur looked around for the source.

"You won't find him," The man on the sofa looked up to him. "He'll show himself in time." Then he looked at a point in the room. Arthur looked there too, but saw nothing. The man spoke.

"Shut up, Køhler." There was a huffing noise, and then quiet.

"My name is Lukas," the man on the sofa said. "You don't need to be so formal, no one here is anyone's boss."

"Oh.. Okay then…" Arthur said. He went over to the chair opposite Lukas and sat down at the gesture.

"So, shall we begin?" Lukas said, "This interview may be different from what you would expect, so are you prepared?" Out of seeming lie nowhere, a pack of cards and a cell phone appeared. "You don't need an educational background, but once you're in, you can quit, but it's not easy to."

Different? Arthurs head swam. So he didn't need that bleeding degree for his job, but it would be hard to quit the job if he took it… But the pay was good, so there was a good point- Oh! Gilbert had said to Yong Soo to not kill him, could the job be dangerous? But…

The need for a job pushed all negativity to the back of his head. He turned to Lukas, who wasn't smiling, but had a look of expectation in his eyes. The Brit swallowed.

"So are you ready?" Lukas asked again.

Arthur looked out of the corner of his eye, and thought he saw a faint outline of a man with spiked hair. The man smiled and gave a thumbs up. Arthur pulled his focus back to Lukas.

"Yes, I'm ready."

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**And there is the sucky first chapter... Huh. If you like it, you can favorite or review! It's got a pretty straight forward plot, so I shouldn't be so messed up as my last fanfic. **

**ATTENTION: THERE WILL BE NO PAIRINGS IN THIS WHATSOEVER. SO I'M GONNA JUST TAG IGGY, OKAY? .**

**~U-Kii-San/Hiddy**


	2. A Sea Of Paper

**Chapter 2! This was written on my phone, so sorry for any mistakes ^^;**

**Disclaimer: Hetalia = Not Mine T_T (If it was, England would totally wear his police uniform all the time. Yup.)**

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"Eliza, what are they doing, da ze?"

"Shut it! I can't see or hear well!""

A Korean and Hungarian stood behind a thick black curtain at the end of the interviewing room. At the moment, Yong Soo was standing impatiently against the wall as Elizabeta peeked out.

"Well?" Yong Soo tapped his foot impatiently as quietly as possible so Lukas wouldn't hear. "What's happening, da ze?"

"Oh, Lukas seems happy, I think-whats his name? Arthur? Well he must have chose the correct cards-"

"That emotionless freak can LOOK happy?"

Clang! Elizabeta put a heavy duty frying pan back into her belt while Yong Soo whined about the bump on his head now.

"Not cool, da ze!"

"Don't speak badly about Lukas!"

"But he's such a fun ruiner, da ze!"

"Be quiet!"

Both of them sucked in their breath as Lukas turned to face them. He did the tiniest eye roll, but that got his point across.

"Aw, shit! He saw us!"

"That's because you can't keep you damn mouth shut, da ze!"

"You-"

They were interrupted by a rustling sound. The curtain moved slightly, as if someone was sliding in. As they watched, a man began to materialize. He seemed translucent, and his shoulder had gone through the curtain. He ran a hand through his spiked hair and gave them a bright smile. Yong Soo and Elizabeta smiled back. His happiness was infectious.

"Hello Køhler!" Yong Soo whisper screamed. Eliza gave a polite nod. The man smiled again.

"Hallo! Listen, I think the new guy is gonna make it. I haven't seen Norge this excited in a while, and you know how he has the emotion of a rock!" The man said happily. Norge, or Lukas to the rest of the world, was the one to have brought him into battle again, so he was always happy when Lukas was happy. Something about debt, he had told the others. But secretly he thought of Norge as a really good friend.

Elizabeta inwardly grimaced at the insult to her 'boss', but kept a frozen smile since Køhler was after all, Lukas' associate. Yong Soo just outright laughed (silently), but stopped quickly after an elbow to his gut (courtesy of Elizabeta).

Kølher stepped out of the curtain, but not before promising a excited Yong Soo that he will tell him later whether Arthur made it or not. Eliza looked at the Korean.

"Since he promised to tell us, why don't we get out of this dusty curtain?" She offered.

Yong Soo thought about it. "I suppose we could, da ze. We will be the first to know, which is awesome!"

Elizabeta chuckled. "I suppose." They slipped out of the dusty curtain and into the side door leading to Yong Soo's office (Read: Game Room).

The room was filled with an explosion of colours and lots of game discs strewn around on the floor. Eliza side stepped a pile of disc covers and flopped down onto a bright red and blue splattered bean bag. Yong Soo barrelled through the exact same pile to sit down on another ludicrously coloured bean bag. Elizabeta sighed as discs flew all over.

"So what do we do now, da ze? 'Cuz I'm bored..." The Korean whined. Elizabeta refrained from pointing out the fact that there were at least 300 games all over the floor and about 6 different game consoles. She settled for a punch to the Korean's face and an eye roll when he yelled, "WHAT THE HELL, DA ZE!?"

"Ah, bonjour, does anyone want to eat lunch? I am going down to the cafeteria to make sure Gilbo actually cooks decent food." A Frenchman stuck his head in, shaking his head at the mess.

"Yo, Francis!" Yong Soo yelled. He got up. "I'll go with you, I'm hungry da ze! Eliza, you comin'?" He asked.

Eliza scoffed. "Please, you guys know I hate Gil. Plus, who's Kølher gonna go to when Arthur's interview is over?"

Francis looked intrigued. "Arthur?"

"Yup, he's the new guy. Chances are he'll get the job, so get used to him, da ze. He can be a slight fun ruiner, but he's still really cool, da ze!"

Yong Soo proceeded to tell Francis all about his newfound 'friend'. Eliza didn't like the look on Francis' face though, and told him so by hitting him on the head with a frying pan.

"You will not do anything to make Arthur uncomfortable," Elizabeta glared at him.

Francis groaned, "Mon Cher, you wound me! Of course Big Brother won't do anything!"

"No 'spreading love' either."

Francis went and sat in a rather convenient emo corner that randomly appeared. Gloom covered him. "B-But that's what the French do!" A spotlight shone into the corner to reveal the sobbing Frenchman.

"Stop being so dramatic," Eliza rolled her eyes, resisting the urge to knock him unconscious. "I'm staying. Im,

"Sure, da ze!" Yong Soo pulled a sulking Francis out of the emo corner and down to the lift. Eliza gave a slight exasperated smile at the childish Korean before following.

Gil sighed, flicking pieces of paper in the air. He was bored. Bored with a Capital B. An that was so unawesome words couldn't describe it. Matthew wasn't in, so he didn't get the awesome pancakes like he usually did. But then again, there was the new guy, Arthur… Well, he sure seemed like an unawesome stick in the mud. But he might just be fun to awesomely tease, the albino thought with a grin. Tiny pieces of scrunched up paper littered the floor. It seemed like snow had covered the floor of the cafeteria. The double doors opened as Gil looked up.

"FINALLY, FRANNY! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW UNAWESOMELY BORED I WAS!" Gilbert exclaimed with excitement. Francis looked at the sea of paper on the floor.

"I can see that," He remarked jokingly. "I'm not cleaning that up, by the way," He added as Gilbert opened his mouth.

The Prussian pouted (awesomely). "You're just racist about paper, aren't you?"

"Mon Cher, if I was, that would mean you are too, non?" Francis said, raising an elegant eyebrow.

"Touché, Franny." Gilbert muttered as he grabbed a fistful of paper. Instead of dumping it into the bin, he threw it at Francis. Said Frenchman just sighed and shook them off. Then, Yong Soo walked in.

"EPIC, DA ZE! IT'S A SEA OF PAPER!" Gilbert grinned/smirked at the Korean's happy expression.

"Ja, 'cuz I'm just that awesome!"

"Am I awesome too, da ze?"

"No Shit Sherlock, my awesome-but-not-as-awesome-as-me buddy!"

"Awesome! You're epic, Gil!"

"Nah, I'm-" Francis coughed, successfully interrupting what would have been a very long and idiotic conversation.

"As entertaining as talking about awesomeness should be for you guys, we have lunch to make for this building," Francis said, effectively shoving Gilbert towards the counter. "I'm cooking since I won't put it past you, Gilbo, to blow up the stove AND write on the walls with the remains of the stove," A scathing look was shot at the albino, who tried and failed to look innocent.

"It wasn't me, it was Im!"

"Of course, Yong Soo would write in German on the walls in charcoal."

"He totally would!"

"Um… Gil, I don't know German, da ze…"

"I rest my case," The Frenchman muttered, before walking into the kitchen. Gilbert stuck his tongue out at the retreating man's back.

"We don't need him, right Im?" Scoffed the Prussian

"Nope, da ze!"

Just then, Køhler burst through the doors with Elizabeta. Even as a spirit, he somehow caused more physical damage than the average human. Gil looked up.

"Hey Køhler, Hey Liz!"

"Hallo!"

"…What the hell is all this paper?"

Yong Soo's head popped out from under the counter where he had been collecting the pieces of said paper. He immediately shot over to Køhler and Eliza, eyes gleaming expectantly.

"So?"

"He made it!"

Before they had a chance to react, Yong Soo disappeared in a blur.

"ART!" They heard what seemed like a bull tearing through the building. (actually, it was Yong Soo)

Eliza gave a tiny smile. Køhler laughed.

"He really likes Arthur, doesn't he?"

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**ANNDD That was chapter 2. Wow. *sarcasm***

**Hope you liked! **

**~U-Kii-San**


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